英语小品剧本搞笑(英语小品剧本搞笑3人)

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求助英语小品,五个人演的,要幽默点,谢谢!!

英语搞笑话剧《孔雀东南飞》

英语小品剧本搞笑(英语小品剧本搞笑3人)

作者:佚名文章来源:本站原创点击数:7713更新时间:2005-11-27

Wanderseveryfivemiles

焦仲卿Johnny(Jforshort)刘兰芝Lunch(Lforshort)

焦母Johnny’smother(JMforshort)刘母Lunch’smother(LMforshort)

太守之子Mayor’sson(MSforshort)强盗Burglars(ABandC)

Prologue本文转自:www.coffbar.com小品剧本,简历封面,免费电影

(J作被打状跑上台,内砸出一卷纸筒,J被打中,狼狈不堪)

J:EverybodysaysthatI’mhenpecked,butinfact,I’masstrongasatiger,(小声)whilemy

wifeisWuSong.

(指着上台处的门大声道)I’mnotafraidofyou!

(内砸出一脸盆,J接住当成盾牌护着头)Then,I’mafraidofwhom?

MywifeLunchisthemostfamouswomanintheneighbor-hood.Sheisbraverthanme,

smarterthanmeandstrongerthanme.AllthisIdonotcare.Ionlywanthertobetender

thanme.Butsheisnot!Havingawifelikethisisjustlikelivinginthehell!

(内又砸出一卷纸筒,击中J)

MyGod!Whocanhelpme?(下)

Act1

(序幕结束时,JM作窃听状)

JM(拄拐棍上):Ican!

(对门内)Lunch!Lunch!Whereareyou?

L(扎着围裙,拿着锅铲,从门内跳出来):I’mhere!What’supmum?

JM:I’vetoldyouagainandagainthatyoushouldcallme“mymostbeautifulgracefuland

dearestmother-in-law”.

L:OK.Mymostbeautifulgracefulanddearestmother-in-law,what’sup?

JM:Sinceyoumarriedmysonyouhavebehavedsobadly.Youhavebeensorude,sobrusque,so

lazy……

L:But……

JM:Neverinterruptme!

L:Neverinterruptme!SinceImarriedyourson,thatterribleJohnny,Ihavebeenworkinghardall

daylong,cookingandwashing.Ihaveraisedtensofthousandsofpigsandducksandchicken

and……

JM:Butallthoseyouhavedonearenotasvaluableasagrandson!

L(生气地挥动着锅铲):Oh,youwantagrandson,don’tyou?(开始解围裙)Goandaskyour

son.I’mleaving!(扯下围裙,扔在JM的脸上,下)

Act2

(LM坐在台上打毛线,L拿着锅铲上)

L:Mum,I’mback!

LM:Youareback?Why?Whathappened?

L:Iwaskickedoutbymymostbeautifulgracefulanddearestmother–in-law.

LM(惊讶,但随即露出幸灾乐祸的神情):See!Ihavealreadytoldyou!Whenyouinsistedon

marryingthatterribleJohnny,Itoldyouthatheisuglystupidandpoor,butyoudidnotlisten

tome.Lookatyourself……

L:But,mum……

LM:Neverinterruptme!

L:Mum,I’mnotinterruptingyou.IjustwanttotellyouthatyouarealwaysrightOK?And

I’llmarrywhomeveryouwantmeto.

LM(大喜):Nicegirl!Justnow,Imetthemayor’ssoninthemarket.Hesaid:“Ifyoudaughter

Haven’tbeenmarried,Ireallyreallywanttomarryher!”Nowyouarefreeagain,I’llgo

andtellhim.(下)

L(惊愕):What?Themayor’sson?Themostfamousplayboyintheneighbor-hood?(手中的锅

铲掉在地上)WhatasillythingIhavedone!(下)

Act3本文转自:www.coffbar.com小品剧本,简历封面,免费电影

(J睡眼惺忪上)

J(边走边道):Lunch!Lunch!Wherearemysocks?

(走了几步,在地上捡起袜子)Heretheyare!(闻一下)Er!Howsmelly!Theyarestilldirty!

(突然想起)Lunchhasgone!Ihavetowashthemmyself.

(他的肚子似乎咕咕叫了起来)Oh,I’msohungry!Butthere’snobreakfast!(捡起地上的围

裙)ThisiswhatLunchalwayswears!Imisshersomuch,andherexcellentcookingskill!Now

shehasgone.Ihavetocookformymotherandmyself.

JM(上):Where’smybreakfast?Where’sLunch?Hasn’tshegotupyet?

J:Mum,can’tyouremember?Lunchhasgone!

JM(沉吟片刻):Well,totellyouthetruthJohnny,asonwithoutawifeisuseless.Lunchisanice

girl,goandtakeherback!

J(立正敬礼):Yesmadam!

Act4

(J开心地走着,忽然跳出来三个强盗)

A:Heyyou!Stopandlistentous!

Theroadisbuiltbyme!(抬脚重重地踩在一块大石头上)

B:AndIplantedonetree!(亦抬脚踩在同一块石头上)

C:Ifyouwanttogobythisstreet---(欲踩石头,但踩到了A的脚)

AB&C:Giveusallyourmoney!

J(搜遍了每一个口袋,掏出1角硬币):Is1maoenough?

(三强盗晕倒状,接着三人聚在一边商量)

A:Whatbadluck!Thisguyisbroken!

B:Ifwecannotrobanymoneytoday,wewillhavenothingtoeattonight!

C:Iheardthatthemayor’ssonisgoingtomarryMissLiuLanzhinextmonth.WEcangoand

robthewedding!

A&B:Goodidea!

J(惊讶):What?What?Lunchisgoingtogetmarried?It’simpossible!

AB&C:Why?Aprettygirlandarichman,whatagoodcouple!

J:ButLunchismywife!Wehaven’tgotdivorcedyet!

(突然有了主意)I’vegotanidea!Youaregoingtorobthewedding,don’tyou?I’llgo

withyou.YoutakethemoneyandItakethebride.

B:Haveyougotanyexperience?

J:No.ButI’vegotthis!(J脱下鞋子从里面摸出一张支票,上书$1,000,000)

Act5

(转眼已到了婚礼之期.MS意气风发用红绸牵着新娘上,J盖着红盖头极不情愿地被拉上台)

(J和三强盗跃至台中)

ABC&J:Heyyou!Stopandlistentous!

A:Theroadisbuiltbyme!

B:AndIplantedonetree.

C:Ifyouwanttogobythisstreet---

J:Giveusallyourmoney!

(L听到J的声音,掀起了盖头)

L(惊喜万分):Johnny!(不顾一切地飞奔到J的身边并躲到了的身后)

(MS大怒,挥拳向J打来.J矮身一躲,MS打中了J身后的L,L晕倒)

J(火冒三丈):Howdareyoubeatmywife!(挥拳向MS冲去)

(J与MS混战,JM上,以拐杖击晕MS)

(J将MS胸前的新郎标志扯下戴在自己胸前)

J(扶起L,关切地问):Honey,howareyou?

L(哭状):Ihurtalot!

J:Don’tcrybaby.I’llgoandfetchthemedicine.(下)

L(起身去追):Waitforme!(跑下)

(音乐起CanYouCelebrate)

谁有英语的搞笑小品剧本

Apoundofflesh

BassanioandShylockcome

Bassanio:Hello,Mr.Shylock.Longtimenosee.Howaboutyoubusinessthesedays,Imeanlendingmoneywithinterests.ButnowIwanttotellyousomething.Wouldyouliketogivemeahand?Canyoulendmethreethousanddollars?

Shylock:Threethousanddollars;well

Bassanio:Ay,Sir,forthreemonths.

Shylock:Forthreemonths;well.

Bassanio:Forthewhich,asItoldyou,Antonioshallbebound.

Sholock:Antonioshallbebound;well.

Bassanio:ShallIknowyouranswer?

Shylock:ThreethousanddollarsforthreemonthsandAntoniobound.

Antonioenters

Bassanio:ThisisAntonio.

Shylock:Antonio,manyatimeandoftenintherialto(交易所),youhaverated(估价)meaboutmymoney,andIhavebornitwithapatientshrug(我总是忍气吞声,耸耸肩膀,没有跟您争辩),forsufferance(忍耐)isthebadge(特色)ofallourtribe.Youcallmemisbeliever(异教徒),cut-throatdog(杀人的狗),andspitup(吐痰)onmyJewishgarments.Wellthenitappearsyouneedmyhelp:youcometome,andyousay‘Shylock,wewouldhavemoney’,yousayso,youdidvoidyourrheum(吐唾沫)uponmybeard,andfootmeasyouspurn(弃绝)astrangecur(杂种狗).WhatshouldIsaytoyou?ShouldIsaydoghasmoney?Isitpossibleacurcanlendthreethousanddollars?OrshallIbendlowandinabondman’skey(像一个奴隶一样),withabatedbreath(低声下气)andwhisperinghumblenee(恭恭敬敬的),saythis:FairSir,youspitonmeonWednesdaylast,youspurnedsuchaday,anothertime,youcallmeadog,andforthesecourtesies(礼貌),Ilendyouthusmuchmoney.

Antonio:Iamasliketocallyousoagain.Tospitonyouagain,tospurnyoutoo.

Shylock:Why,lookyou,howyouangry.Iwouldbefriendswithyouandhaveyoulove.

Bassanio:Thiswerekindness.

Shylock:ThiskindnesswillIshow.Gowithmetoanotary(公证人),sealmethere(在哪儿签约),yoursinglebound;andinamerrysport(不妨开个玩笑).Ifyourepaymenotonsuchaday,insuchaplace,suchsumorsumsasareexpressedinthecondition.Letforfeit(罚款,没收物)benominatedforanequalpoundofyourfairflesh,tocutoffandtakeninwhatpartofyourbodypleaseme.

(Threemonthslater.Thedayofpaymentbeingpast,thecruelJewwouldnotacceptofthemoneywhichBassanioofferedhim,butinsisteduponhavingapoundofAntonio’sflesh.AdaywasappointedtotrythisshockingcasebeforetheDukeofVenice,andBassanioindreadfulsuspense(焦虑)theeventofthetrial(审判)。

people:IncludingDuke,Bassanio,Shylock,Antonio,Portia

Duke:What,isAntoniohere?

Antonio:Ready,sopleaseyourgrace(有,殿下)

Duke:Iamsorryforyou:youhavetoanswerastonyadversary(对手),aninhumanwretch,uncapableofpity,void,empityfromanydramofmercy.(我很为你不快,你是跟一个心如铁石的对手但当庭对质,一个不懂怜悯,没有一丝慈悲心的不近人情的恶汉。)

Antonio:Idoopposemypatiencetohisfury,tosuffer.

Duke:Goone,andcalltheJewintothecourt.

Bassanio:Heisreadyatthedoor,hecomes,myLord.

Duke:Makeroom,andlethimstandbeforeourface.Shylock,theworldthink,andIthinksotoo,youleadsthisfashionofthemalice(恶意),tothelasthourofact,youwouldshowyourmercy.Andnowexecuatethepenalty,whichisapoundofthispoormerchant’sflesh.But,touchedwithhumangentleneeandlove,forgiveit,glancinganeyeofpityonhislosses,weallexpectagentleanswer,Jew.

Shylock:AndbyourholySabbathhaveIsworn,tohavethedue(应得物),andforfeitofmybond.Youaskme,whyIratherchoosetohaveaweightofcarrionflesh(腐肉)thantoreceivethreethousanddollars,I’llnotanswerthat.But,say,itismyhumour,isittheanswer?Whatifmyhousebetroubledwithrat(老鼠),andIbepleasedtogivetenthousanddollarstohaveitbaned?What,isitaanswer?Somementheyarelovenotagapingpig(张开嘴的猪),somearemadiftheybeholdacat,asthereisnofirmreasontoberender(回答).SocanIgivenoreason.

Bassanio:Thisisnoanswer,youunfeelingman,toexcusethecurrentofthecruelty.(你这冷酷无情的家伙,这样的回答可不能作为你的残忍的辩解。)

Shylock:Iwanttopleaseyouwithmyanswer.

Bassanio:Doallmenkillthethingstheydonotlove?

Shylock:Whowillhateanythinghewouldnotkill?

Bassanio:Everyoffenceisnotahateatfirst.

Shylock:What,wouldyouhaveaserpant(大毒蛇)stingyoutwice?

Bassanio:Forthethreethousanddollars,hereissix.

Shylock:WhatjudgementshallIdread(担心),Iwouldnotwantsixthousand,Iwouldhavemybond.

Duke:Howshallyouhopeformercy?

Shylock:whatjudgementshallIdread,doingnowrong?Iansweryou:thepoundofflesh,whichIdemandofhim,isalreadybought,thisismine.AndIwillhaveit.Ifyoudenyme,fie(呸)uponyourlaw!(你们的法律见鬼去吧!)Istandforjudgement:answer,shallIhaveit?

Duke:IjustreceivedaletterfromBellario,alearneddoctor.

Bassanio:(toShylock)Whydoesyouwhet(磨快)thekniefsoearnestly?

Shylock:Tocutthefleshfromthatbankruptthere.

Duke:ThisletterfromBellariodoescommandayoungandlearneddoctortoourcourt.Whereishe.

Portia:Juststandsnearhere.

Duke:Withallmyheart,welcome.Doyouunderstandthetwoviewpointinthecourt?

Portia:OfcourseIknow.Whichisthemerchanthere,andwhichtheJew?

Duke:Antonioandoldshylock,bothstandforth.

Portia:IsyournameShylock?

Shylock:Shylockismyname.

Portia:Thecaseisstrange,butaccordingtotheVenetianlaw,cannotlimityouasyoudoproceed.(pointtoAntonio)Youstandwithinhisdanger,doyounot?(你的生死掌握在他的手里,是不是?)

Antonio:Ay,sohesays.

Portia:Doyouconfessthebond?

Antonio:Ido.

Portia:ThenmusttheJewbemerciful(仁慈)

Shylock:WhymustIbemerciful?Tellmethereason.

Portia:Thequalityofmercylikesgentlerainfromheaven,andmercywasdoubleblessing,weallpreyformercy.

Shylock:Mydeedsaredesidedbymyhead!Iaskthelaw,thepenaltyandforfeitofmycontract.

Portia:Ishenotabletopaythemoney.

Bassanio:Yes,hereIwanttopayitforhiminthecourt,twicethesum,ifthatnotenough,Iwanttopayittentimes.ThethingsIpaycanbemyhands,myhead,myheart.Ifthiswillnotenough,Iwouldthoughtyouwerebadenough.AndIaskyoucorrectoncethelaw,todoagreatright,doalittlewrong,andcontrolthiscrueldevilofhiswill.

Portia:Itmustnotbe;therisnopowerinVenicecanalteralawestablished.

Shylock:Awiseyoungjudge,howIdohonouryou.

Portia:Iprayyou,letmekookuponthebond.

Shylock:Herethis,mostreverend(尊敬的)doctor,hereitis.

Portia:Shylock,there’sthrice(三倍的)themoneyofferedyou.

Shylock:Anoath(誓言),anoath,Ihaveanoathinheaven.ShallIlayperjury(伪证)uponmysoul,No,notforVenice(整个威尼斯给我都不行).

Portia:Why,thisbondisforfeit(照约处罚),Jewmaycutoffapoundoffleshnearestthemerchant’sheart.Bemerciful,takethricethemoney,bid(吩咐)metearbond.

Shylock:Whenitispaidaccordingtothebond.Itdoesappearyouareaworthlyjudge.Youknowthelaw,yourexposition(说明)hasbeenmostsound,Ichargeyoubythelaw,youareawell-deservingpillar.ThereisnopowerinthetongueofmanIstayhereommybond.(谁也不能用他的口舌改变我的决心,我现在等着执行).

Antonio:MostheartlyIdobeseech(恳求)thecourttogivethejudgement.

Portia:Youmustprepareyourbosomfortheknife.

Shylock:Oh,noblejudge!Oh,excellentyoungman!

Portia:thereforelaybareyourbosom.Aretherbalanceheretoweightheflesh.

Shylock:Ihavethemready.(takeoutaknife)

Portia:Askasurgeontocome,Shylock,onyourcharge(费用归你),tostophiswounds,otherwisehewillbleedtodeath.

Shylock:Isitsonominatedinthebond?Icann’tfindit,itisn’tinthebond.

Portia:You,merchant,haveyouanythingtosay?

Antonio:Butlittle,Iamwellperpared,givemeyourhand,Bassanio,Goodbyeforever.Commendmetoyourhonourablewife,tellhertheprocessofAntonio’send;sayhowIlovedyou,speakmefairindeath(从容就义);hewon’tregretithepaysyoudebt.FortheJewdocutbutdeepenough,I’llpayitpresentlywithallmyheart.

Bassanio:Antonio,Iammarriedtoalifewhichisasdeartomeaslifeitself;butyourlifeisthemostimportantthanallofthis.Iwouldloseall,sacrificethemall.Heretothisdevil,todelieveyou.(我愿意丧失一切,把它们献给这恶魔做牺牲,来救出你的生命).

Portia:Youwifewouldgiveyoulittlethanksforthat.Ifshewerehere.

Shylock:thesebethechristianhusbands.Ihaveadaughter,wouldanysonofburglerhadbeenherhusbandratherthanachristian!

Portia;Apoundofthatsamemerchant’sfleshisyours:thecourtawardsit,andlawdoesgiveit.

Shylock:mostrightfuljudge!

Portia:youmustcutthisfleshfromhisbreast.Thelawallowsit,andtheawardsit.

Shylock:mostlearnedjudge!Asentence!Come,prepare!

Portia:Waitamoment,there;ssomethingelse.Thisbondincludenojot(少量)ofblood;thewordsexpresslyareapoundofflesh.But,inthecutting,ifyoudoesshedonedropofchristian’sblood,yourlandsandgoodsconfiscate(充公)bytheVenicelaw.

Bassanio:Oh,learnedjudge!Listen,Jew,alearnedjudge.

Shylock:Isthatthelaw?

Portia:Youwillseetheact(你自己可以去看看明白).Forasyouurgestjustice,beassuredyoushallhavejustice(既然你要求公道,我就给你公道),morethanyoudesired.

Shylock:Itakethisoffer,thenpaythebondthrice.Andletthechristiango.

Bassanio:Hereisthemoney.

Portia:Soft(别忙),TheJewshallhavealljustice;soft!Nohaste.Heshallhavenothingbutthepenalty.

Bassanio:Oh,Jew!Anuprightjudge,alearnedjudge!

Portia:Thereforeprepareyoutocutofftheflesh,neitherblood,norcutlessnormore,butjustapoundofflesh;ifyoucutmoreorlessthanajustpound,ifthescaledoturn,youdieandallthegoodsareconfiscate.

Bassanio:Now,Ihaveyouonthehip(你可掉我手里),

Partia:whydoestheJewpause?Taketheforfeiture.

Shylock:Givememyprincipal(本金),andletmego.

Bassanio:Ihaveitreadyforyou;hereitis.

Portia:Hehasrefuseditintheopencourt.Heshallhavemerelyjusticeandhisbond.

Shylock:ShallInothavebarelymyprincipal?

Portia:Youwouldhavenothingbuttheforfeiture,exceptcuttingapoundoffleshatthedanger.Jew.

Shylock:Thenthedevilgivehimgoodofit!I’llstaynolongerquestion(让魔鬼保佑他去享用吧!我不打这场官司了).

Portia:Jew,thelawhaveanotherrelationtoyou.Toseekthelifeofanycitizenbydirectorindirectattempts,halfofhispropertybelongstothecitizen,theotherhalftothestate.Thedangerformelybymerehearsed(你已经遭逢我刚才所说起的危险了).Downthereforeandbegmerceoftheduke.

Duke:Youwillseethedifferenceofourspirts,Ipardonyouthelifebeforeyouaskit.Forhalfthewealth,itisAntonio;theotherhalftothestate.

Portia:Ay,forthestate,notfortheAntonio.

Shylock:No,takemylifeandall;pardonnotthat.Youtakemyhousewhenyoudotaketheprop(支柱)thatdoessustainmyhouse;youtakemylifewhenyoudotakethemeans(养家活命的根本)wherebyIlive.

Portia:Whatmercycanyougivehim,Antonio?Aropeforkillorelse?

Antonio:IwillhappyifLordquitthisfineforonehalf.TheotherhalfIwillgivetheloverofhisdaughter.

Portia:Areyoucontended,Jew?Whatdoyousay.

Shylock:Iamcontent,thankyouverymuch.

求英语搞笑话剧剧本。(6人,带翻译更高。)

六人的英语搞笑话剧:《荆珂刺秦王》

旁白(Aside)/介绍(Introduction):

Longagotherewasacrazycountry,inthiscrazycountrythereweresomecrazypeople,tryingtoshowthecrazyhistorybycrazyways.

MrJingkewasthemostfamousswordsmanandwassenttokillkingofQing,“Yingzheng”.Butfinallyhefailed.Doyouwanttoknowwhathappenedatthattime?

很久以前有一个疯狂的国家,在这个疯狂的国家里有一些疯狂的人,试图用疯狂的方式展示疯狂的历史。荆轲先生是最有名的剑客,他被派去杀清王“嬴政”。但最后他失败了。你想知道当时发生了什么吗?

ActionI(第一幕)

太子丹(上,掏出镜子梳头,做自恋状):Mirror,mirror,tellme,whoisthemostprettymanintheworld?(镜子,镜子,告诉我,谁是世界上最漂亮的男人)

(画外音:It'syou,PrinceDan!太子丹高兴状)Thankyoumirror!(面对观众)

I'mPrinceDan,themagicmirrorsaidIamthemostattractivemanintheworld.

ButYingZhengisajealousguy,Ifeelhewillkillmeifmirrortoldhimthetruth.SowhatcanIdo?Whereismyminister?

(我是丹王子,魔镜说我是世界上最有魅力的男人。但是嬴政是个嫉妒心很强的人,我觉得如果镜子告诉他真相,他会杀了我的。那我该怎么办?我的部长在哪里?)

阿三(毕恭毕敬):Honey,Iamcoming.(殿下,我来了)

太子丹:I'vetoldyouagainandagainthatyoushouldcallme:"mymostbeautiful、graceful、handsome、charming、cute、smartanddearestPrinceDan."

(我一再告诉你,你应该叫我:“我最美丽、最优雅、最英俊、最迷人、最可爱、最聪明、最亲爱的丹王子。)

阿三:Sure,honey!Ihaveagoodidea.WecanfindaherotokillYingZheng.(作杀状)

(好的,殿下。我有一个好主意。我们可以找一个人去杀了嬴政)

太子:Ohyeah.Whatisthemostexpensivecommodityinthiscentury?Talent!(二十一世纪最需要的是什么,人才!然后拍阿三肩膀,做赞许状)Goodidea!Butwhoistherightcandidate?

阿三:AfterscreeningIhavetwopromisingpersonsonhand.OneisMissLiMoChou,theotherisMrJinKe.TomorrowtheywillPKfortheNO1killeroftheworld.

(经过筛选,我手头上有两个有前途的人。一个是李莫愁小姐,另一个是荆轲先生。明天他们将为世界头号杀手PK。)

太子:Well,showmethewinnerassoonaspossible,OK?

(好吧,尽快给我看看赢家,好吗?)

阿三:Yes.(好的。)

ActionII(第二幕)

(《十面埋伏》中刘德华&金成武决斗时的音乐)

荆轲:AreyouLimochou?(你是李莫愁?)

李莫愁:Yes.(是的。)

荆轲:OK.I'mJingke,youknow,IwillletyouknowIamthekingofthekillers'world.

(好啊。我是荆轲,你知道,我会让你知道我是杀手世界之王。)

李莫愁:Areyouchallengingme?(你在挑战我吗?)

荆轲:Offcourse!(耸耸肩表示同意)

李莫愁:Comeon!

音乐起,两人冲上前来,“人在江湖漂啊,哪有不挨刀啊,一刀砍死你啊,两刀砍死你啊。”

李莫愁倒地,荆轲大笑。

李莫愁痛苦状:Whathappened?Whyaren'tyouhurt?

(发生了什么?为什么你不会受伤?)

荆轲:Wedon'tneedanyreasontowinaperson.Don'twe?Dowe?(赢一个人需要理由么,不需要么,需要么?)

李莫愁:Mommaalwayssaid:"Lifeislikeaboxofchocolates,Mochou.Youneverknowwhatyou'regonnaget."Igotit,Mommaisright.

(妈妈总是说:“人生就像一盒巧克力,莫愁。你永远不知道你会得到什么。“我知道了,妈妈是对的。)

荆轲再次大笑

太子丹上(抱拳):Howareyou?

荆柯:Fine,thankyou,andyou?

太子丹:OhmyGod!Couldyougivemeaninnovativeanswerto“Howareyou?”

荆柯:Sure!

太子丹:Howareyou?

荆柯:Fine,thankyou,andyourwife?

太子丹晕倒

荆柯:Hey,man,I’mkidding!

太子丹:Oh,I’mkiddingtoo!(毕恭毕敬)MayIhaveyournamecard,please?

荆轲从兜里掏出一卷纸,上面写着:Tobeornottobe,that'saquestion.

(生存还是毁灭,这是个问题。)

阿三:Hero,weneedyourhelp.(好汉,我们需要你的帮助。)

荆柯:Iambusynow!(我忙着呢!)

太子丹:Youcangetalotofmoney.(你可以得到很多钱。)

荆柯:Iamverybusynow!(我现在非常的忙。)

阿三:IC,ID,IQcard?

荆柯:Iamveryverybusynow!(我真的真的非常忙。)

阿三(手指上场的美女,激动状):Look!Sheisthemostbeautifulgirlintheworld.IfyousayO.K.,sheisyours.(你看,那是世界上最美丽的女子,如果你答应了,她就是你的了。)

荆柯(流口水):Ihavetosaysheisaverysexyandbeautifulgirl,butTCMismyonlylove!

(我不得不说她是个性感又美丽的女人,但TCM才是我唯一的爱人。)

阿三:What?What'stheTCM?

荆柯;Hey,guy!Youlooksosmartbutwhyyoudidn'tknowTCM?Anyofthemcangiveyoutheanswer.(小子,看你挺聪明却不知道TCM。让我来告诉你吧。)

阿三:Excuseme?What’stheTCM?

观众甲:TCM-TraditionalChineseMM.

太子丹:Imustshowyouthetrumpcard.Ladiesandgentlemen,thisisLiptonSlimmingtea.ItisabrandnewproductofUnileverChina.

(我必须给你看王牌。女士们先生们,这是利普顿减肥茶。是联合利华中国的一个全新产品。)

荆柯(激动):Slimmingtea!Ihavedreamedofitforthousandsoftimes.MywifealwaysthreatenstoleavemeifIcouldn'treducemyweight.

(减肥茶!我已经梦想了几千次了。我妻子总是威胁说如果我不能减肥就离开我。)

阿三:Youwant?Speakupifyouwant!Whydoyoukeepsilent?Whyareyoulookingatme?Althoughyoureyesarefullofsincerity,I'mveryglad,youstillhavetospeakup.Takeit!Doyoureallylike?Really?

(你想要什么?如果你愿意,就大声说!你为什么保持沉默?你为什么看着我?虽然你的眼睛充满了诚意,但我很高兴,你还是得大声说。拿着它!你真的喜欢吗?真的?)

荆柯(诚恳状)JusttellmewhatshouldIdo?Iwilldoanythingforyou.

(告诉我该怎么办?我愿意为你做任何事。)

太子丹与阿三(撞胯,击掌):Yeah!

全剧终

拍英语话剧的注意事项

1、首先,组员要熟悉理解剧本,能够充分理解剧本的内容,然后进行表情和细节性的标注,这样会有助于现场的拍摄,同样进行一幕一幕的划分,这样不会使组员太过紧张忘词。

2、其次就是准备道具,一定要全,老师会很在意我们在细节方面的用心程度,倘若我们精心地准备了道具的话,会给老师留下一个不错的印象,很容易得高分。

3、然后就是角色的分配,一定要合理,要根据人们在现实生活中的性格进行分配,这样有助于增加话剧的真实性,从而更生动,同时也要考虑到不同组员的英语水,要考虑周全。

4、然后最最最重要的便是背台词,一定要理解,切记,当我们感觉一句话念不通的时候,可以用简单句进行改写,便于背诵也便于理解,不一定一字不差的照着剧本背,这样也违背了我们学英语的初衷。

5、然后便是拍摄,注意的是情感的投入尤其是表情,还有就是拍摄的角度一定要合理,符合当时情景。进行一幕一幕地拍摄,中途有适当的休息。然后就是尽量多个角度进行切镜头,这样效果会好很多。

6、然后就是后期制作,这一点尤为重要,主要分为四部分,一、片头和片尾的制作,二、视频的剪辑,三、片头和片尾音乐的挑选,四、字幕的制作。